Meeting this one couple indelibly imprinted on my heart and mind the importance of belonging to the spiritual community called the Church.
My wife, Joanne, and I were wrapping up a Weekend to Remember. It’s a FamilyLife conference for couples to strengthen their marriages. All ages attend, and all types and conditions of marriages are in the room. It’s always a very warm atmosphere at the conclusion, and many couples come to meet us and share how they benefited from the weekend.
This time, a well-dressed, elderly couple approached. They held hands, but they did not look happy. When we heard their story we understood why. They were new to Christianity. A few years earlier they had heard the truth about the promised Messiah. As Jews, they had come to believe in Jesus. But, this created huge problems for them. Their children and extended family completely rejected them. They cut them off, totally. No contact. No time with grandchildren. No care offered as they entered their retirement years. Though their marriage was strong, they felt utterly alone and abandoned. They lamented that they had no family legacy to point to. It was just the two of them on a lonely relational island. Tears told the story of their sorrow and longing.
We all need an expanded, forever family.
How could we offer anything to encourage this couple? I pointed them to the one consolation that millions of Christians down through history, and even today, have clung to:
In Christ, you have a new, expanded, and forever family.
Really, the only family you will be able to count on for this life, and into eternity. This truth does not cancel or deny this couple's grief, but it does trumpet an available resource too easily ignored, and often grossly under-valued.
The recipients of the Apostle Peter’s letter knew what it was like to be abandoned, disenfranchised, and relegated to the margins of family and society. It was to people who had lost their earthly bearings and their traditional measurements of success and legacy that Peter wrote:
"But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light. Once you were not a people, but now you are God’s people; once you have not received mercy, but now you have received mercy" (I Peter 2:9-10).
Our own family will at times fall short.
We often don’t perceive our deeper needs beyond our immediate blessings. If you enjoyed the holidays with family, surrounded by generations and traditions, that is a great blessing from God. However, each one of us, no matter how ensconced we might be in a warm, extended family, will one day be faced with its limits. They won’t always be able to be there for us, nor will they always have the strength or resources we need.
We need others as well. We need a community with real heart, skin, and love.
When a true 'brother' or 'sister' in the faith stands in with the love and the listening we most need, this is the truest and most lasting resource of family known to man.
The Father knew this and created the Living Church as our truest provision.
God created the Church to be a family.
We really do need each other! But is that need to be reserved for dire circumstances and the sad failures and weaknesses of our earthly families? No. We are a family created from all races, classes, and talents. Of course, we need each other in the body of Christ when our human resources have proven delinquent or absent, but we also need each other for a host of positive reasons.
When we are grafted into this forever family with the DNA of Jesus coursing through our souls, we 'grow up' in a whole new way in a whole new family.
Our lives, our temperaments, our gifts, and our relationships are changed, stretched, and enhanced by the new family we have entered. We really don’t discover who we are, or what we are meant to become, without the lapidary polishing we receive in the living community of the Church.
We need each other in the Church.
I speak from experience. Though I am a pastor, I am a church member first, or more broadly put: I am part of Jesus’ new people. I can honestly say that I would not be doing what I am doing, nor would I have discovered my spiritual gifts, without the voices that have spoken into my life over the years. Sometimes those voices have steered me away from wasting my efforts on things that were unproductive. Other times those brothers and sisters have affirmed aspects of strength and gifting that I didn’t recognize in myself, and encouraged me to pursue them.
I have been lifted, encouraged, challenged, comforted, taught, and carried by the body of Christ.
I have watched vital marriages in the body, and tried to emulate their qualities. My faith has been emboldened by the courage of heroes who stayed faithful in their trials. I have surfed on the faith of others when hard times and decisions came along. I have been filled with wonder by the worship and music, the art and generosity of the body of Christ. Make no mistake. I have been so blessed with my personal family, and I depend upon their love and acceptance. But, I also know that my family is not enough for all the tripwires that have and will confront me in life.
The Church is part of God's good plan for us.
No, this is not a veiled agenda to pump up church attendance. Take it as a word from a life coach pointing to the essentials of a holistic life. You will need this. You need it now. Look past the flurry of your busyness to see the important, not just the urgent.
Like a body that can't survive on just pizza and Coke, I invite you to a more organic and healthy diet.
One day your need for the body of Christ will become acutely obvious. But even today, isn’t there a longing for that belonging, that coaching, those deep friends, and the deepening of your own spiritual walk? God’s best idea for our growth, protection, and lifelong care is the body of Christ.
This new year, will you embrace your forever family?
As we begin a new year, why not resolve to make a fresh start: Come to the table of your new family. There is an inventory of unclaimed gifts and resources awaiting. Both for the sobering risks and the joyous discoveries, the Living Church is designed to be your true home - and your forever family.
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